Friends….

friendsThe typical Scorpio that I am, I am extremely sensitive about who I call “my friend”. Not the acquaintance types but the kind of people who make a mark in my life. And am I glad to have such friends. Right from childhood to now, I have some dear friends who have stood by me through thick and thin. And life is a roller coaster ride always. You go through your ups and downs but it is when you are at the nadir, that you realise that there are people who stand by you. These are the friends who matter. All this may sound very cliched, but it is the truth in my case for sure. My friendships or rather relationships have grown over months, years and decades but I have always been proud of my friends. They know what they mean to me in life. We may not meet often but we are there, somewhere there, somewhere around. Just a shout and they will show up.

Aristotle said “Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.” Couldn’t agree more. It is like a garden. The more you put in, the more you get out of it. And like wine, it only gets better with time.

Memories….

friends-memoriesJune 26, 2013 is what it is today….. Circa 1983, 30 years ago, when I left school and entered Junior college (Ruia college). Those were the days. Never realised that you forge friendships at the age of 16 – 19. And ditto for habits. So you could have picked up right or wrong friendships, habits. Am I glad I made the right choice then. Handful of my friends honestly and I know they are not the kinds to even read this except for one. But last Sunday was a pleasant visit of a friend’s Mama who had been to his house and he had back a gift, a watch for me. 30 years ago at the Ruia orientation, he and me got talking thanks to phosphorescence and the watch glowing in the dark. That got us started and honestly time doesn’t come in the way. We still talk like idiots, nonsensical blabbering, cuss words, you name it and it continues as is. I was telling my nephew last week as he embarks on the beaten path at Ruia soon, that these years are formative years of your friendship so make sure you make make the right choice.

Circa 1998….. This is the day Rincon India Solutions Pvt. Ltd. came into being….. So Rincon is 15 years old (as Shirishbhai corrected me not old but young) today. So many people met along the way, such a brilliant team, so many friends made, so many different journeys (including a visit to Buenos Aires via Sao Paolo!). Newer things learnt, greyed, wisened, received bouquets, brickbats …. A memorable journey indeed.

As I sit back and look back at life, I must teach Kavya to make good and long lasting friendships and enjoy this journey called life.

Remembering a friend who moved on……

This evening I was suddenly in rewind mode and remembered a friend, Rashmin Parekh who passed away sometimes in 1999 or 2000. We were surely not the bum chums kind of friends but we were good friends. We had a chance meeting at the Biology practical classes at Ramachandra’s classes way back in 1985 when we were in the XII and we latched on to each other. He went on to become a homeopath and I went on to become an engineer but we kept in touch regularly. He fell in love with a girl and was heart-broken when she was married off to someone else. He went through all the trials and tribulations of a love struck but never acknowledged lover I guess. All I did was offer a shoulder to cry on. He went on to the US and we kept in touch on e-mail and then he came back when he lost his Father to whom he was very much attached to. We met then and talked on the phone often too. I thought he would have returned back and called up his home one evening when I was informed that he had committed suicide two days ago. I did not know what to say and immediately took off to his house. Met his Mom, his sisters and other family members. That was the last time I met them and never even had the guts to call his Mom back after that day. I buried our friendship somewhere deep in my heart though I would always silently wish him a Happy Birthday on August 13th every year. Somehow today evening it all came back as a flood of memories. I would have let it lie deep in my mind but just thought of venting it off. Miss you man. We shared our moments of joy, pain whatever but wherever you are, I am sorry for not ever having called your home after that fateful day. Honestly I don’t know what to say after such a long lapse of time. Somethings are best left unsaid.

Friendship

Watched the second half of Billu Barber on cable again this afternoon. Loved the movie as much as I did in the first watch so much so that I am listening to “Khuda ya khair” from that movie repeatedly.Couple of movies that come to mind on friendship are Dil Chahta Hai (which was watched with our friends Parin and Namrata) and Jhankar Beats. Watching these movies, you realise that friendship is so pure rising above all be it fame, wealth, success, whatever. Nothing matters. I am really honoured to have some great friends in my lifetime. I hope Kavya understands and learns from that.

Penfriends – where are they?

Just this morning read an interesting article in The Lounge (http://www.Livemint.com) which talked about stamp collection (philately) and how the hobby is now completely passe. Yes I don’t add any more stamps to my collection but spent a bomb in South Africa and Venice buying first day covers and mint stamps… Wondering of how pen friendship has changed over the years. My first friend was Herve Bourlon of France way back in 1982 and since then the number was growing. With age either I dropped off or they did. I am just left with the occasional e-mail exchange with Herve but am very very regular on e mail with my dear friend in Venice, Marina. We started exchanging letters in 1987 and somewhere down the line switched to email and now both of us are discussing topics on email. I met her in 2006 which was a memorable trip and I even read my own letters….. nostalgia. Kavya knows Marinafai very well having spoken to her on the phone and then also using the internet but she will in the future ask what is pen friendship in the day of e mail and SMS…. Well I for one know the advantages of it but for her it would be instant…. No more writing letters and then pasting different stamps and mailing. Awaiting a reply that someday the postman (Hmmm not seen one in ages) will come and deliver an envelope with multiple stamps, the postcard inside and may be a Friendship Book. I think Orkut now does the job of networking and friendship books.

Life Experiences

Yesterday during my walk at five gardens I chanced to speak for some 10 odd minutes to my school mate, Mayur Vaid. While he was aware @ Kavya, I was not aware @ his family so just asked him as to how many children? And his reply left me dumb founded. His wife was suffering from acute rheumatoid arthritis and her health was first priority. I must admit I was embarassed having asked him and felt bad and continue to feel bad as to why I ever did that. Having suffered through such questions myself, it was indeed very stupid of me to have asked this question. And all the times when we school mates would meet I was thinking that he was playing the spoil sport by not showing up. But now I realise what the situation could be for him. Reminds me of a book I read and how people react to things and when the scenario is explained how they take it. I am in a similar situation now. Just wanted to get it off my chest and this is one way of confessing. Hats off to him and I really want to apologise to him. Will muster the courage some day and get it off…..